Emails, proposals, website copy, case studies – they’re all responsible for making a crucial first impression. Yet too easily agencies fall back on jargon, generalizations and wordiness when trying to get their message across. But when that game-changing RFP comes through the door, it’s your ability to write persuasively that distinguishes you from the competition and increases your chances of winning the business.

1. Get
Past
the
RFP!
Persuasive
Writing
That
Sells
Presented
by
Jody
Sutter,
The
Sutter
Company
October
9,
2015
0
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

2. 1
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

3. www.thesuttercompany.com
What is
2
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
persuasive
writing?

4. “We also launched targeted
CPA-driven display buys across
endemic and behaviorally
targeted ad networks.”
www.thesuttercompany.com 3
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

5. “We also launched targeted
CPA-driven display buys across
endemic and behaviorally
targeted ad networks.”
www.thesuttercompany.com 4
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
What??

6. Learnings
Sound
familiar?
Customer
journey
www.thesuttercompany.com 5
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Touchpoints
HOLISTIC
Monetize Off
(or
On)
–brand
Value-­‐add
Best-­‐in-­‐class
State-­‐of-­‐the-­‐art
PARADIGM
SHIFT
Leverage
a
best
practice
Core
competency
Brand DNA
Positive
business
outcomes

7. Advertising
is
not
like
making
widgets.
6
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

8. www.thesuttercompany.com
Advertising
is
about
communicating
abstract
ideas
that
only
live
in
our
heads.
7
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

9. 8
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

10. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 9
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
5
Pause. What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
Edit
to
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

11. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 10
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
Pause. What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
5 Editto
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

12. www.thesuttercompany.com
Put yourself in
the
reader’s
shoes.
11
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

13. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 12
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
Pause.
What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
5 Editto
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

14. www.thesuttercompany.com
customize
your
boiler
plate
copy.
Always
13
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

15. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 14
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
Pause.
What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
5 Editto
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

16. 15
Tell
me
a
story…
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

17. Stasis
Trigger Quest Critical
choice
Surprise
Resolution
Climax
Reversal
Triumph
Struggle
www.thesuttercompany.com
A
classic
story
arc
Time
16
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

18. www.thesuttercompany.com
How
Dorothy
did
it
Triumph
Struggle
Time
17
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Stasis
Trigger
Quest
Critical
choice
Surprise
Resolution
Climax
Reversal

19. Situation
Challenge Research Creative
Development
Insight
Results
Campaign
Launch
Measurement
and
Adjustment
Triumph
Struggle
www.thesuttercompany.com
How
you
can
do
it
with
a
case
study
Time
Execution
BIG
IDEA
18
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

20. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 19
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
Pause.
What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use
the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
5 Editto
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

21. The
writer’s
checklist
Active
versus
passive
Simplify
words
Eliminate
unnecessary
words
Avoid
weakling
verbs
Use
adjectives
carefully
www.thesuttercompany.com 20
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

22. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
The project will have been completed
before the deadline.
21
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Active
versus
passive

23. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
The project will have been completed
before the deadline.
22
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Active
versus
passive
We’ll
complete
the
project
before
the
deadline.

24. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
Optimum
Disseminate
Initiate
Utilize
Currently
Numerous
Implement
Assistance
Facilitate
23
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Simplify
words

25. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
Optimum
Disseminate
Initiate
Utilize
Currently
Numerous
Implement
Assistance
Facilitate
24
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Best
Send
Start
Use
Now
Many
Do
Help
Ease
Simplify
words

26. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com 25
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
In an effort to
Is of the opinion that
At this point in time
Due to the fact that
With the exception of
For the purpose of
Until such time as
Referred to as
Simplify
phrases

27. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com 26
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
In an effort to
Is of the opinion that
At this point in time
Due to the fact that
With the exception of
For the purpose of
Until such time as
Referred to as
Simplify
phrases
To
Believes
Now
Because
Except
For
Until
Called

28. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com 27
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Our integrated strategy group is
responsible for insights that are fueled
by consumer data.
Eliminate
unnecessary
words

29. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com 28
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Our integrated strategy group is
responsible for insights that are fueled
by consumer data.
Eliminate
unnecessary
words
Our
strategy
team
uses
data
to
uncover
consumer
insights.

30. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
Gave assistance to
Gave an explanation
Did the marketing for
Call your attention to
29
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Avoid
weakling
verbs

31. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
Gave assistance to
Gave an explanation
Did the marketing for
Call your attention to
30
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Avoid
weakling
verbs
Helped
Explained
Marketed
Remind

32. The
writer’s
checklist
www.thesuttercompany.com
We are passionate about our clients’
business and relentless in pursuing
results on their behalf.
31
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Really?
Use
adjectives
carefully

33. Relentless
Passionate
Superlative
Driven
State-­‐of-­‐the-­‐art
Next-­‐generation
Ban
these
words!
www.thesuttercompany.com 32
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Renowned
Nimble
Breakthrough
Cutting-­‐edge
Flawless
Proven

34. www.thesuttercompany.com 33
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Flesch-­‐Kincaid
Readability
Test

35. www.thesuttercompany.com 34
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Hemingwayapp.com

36. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 35
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
Pause.
What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use
the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
5 Edit
to
simplifyand
clarify
6 Proofread!!

37. 36
The
first
draft
of
anything
is
shit.
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

38. 37
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

39. 38

40. www.thesuttercompany.com
Putting
allthis
into
practice.
39
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

41. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Understanding that there are numerous goals for this
relationship, this proposal reflects our recommendation for
the first three months in an effort to address these
initial objectives within the provided timeframe. Please
note that hard costs associated with photography,
production, etc., have not been accounted for at this time.
40
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

42. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Understanding that there are numerous goals for this
relationship, this proposal reflects our recommendation for
the first three months in an effort to address these
initial objectives within the provided timeframe. Please
note that hard costs associated with photography,
production, etc., have not been accounted for at this time.
Who’s
doing
the
understanding?
41
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

43. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Understanding that there are numerous goals for this
relationship, this proposal reflects our recommendation for
the first three months in an effort to address these
initial objectives within the provided timeframe. Please
note that hard costs associated with photography,
production, etc., have not been accounted for at this time.
Overly
complicated
42
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

44. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Understanding that there are numerous goals for this
relationship, this proposal reflects our recommendation for
the first three months in an effort to address these
initial objectives within the provided timeframe. Please
note that hard costs associated with photography,
production, etc., have not been accounted for at this time.
Buzz-­‐kill
43
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

45. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Understanding that there are numerous goals for this
relationship, this proposal reflects our recommendation for
the first three months in an effort to address these
initial objectives within the provided timeframe. Please
note that hard costs associated with photography,
production, etc. have not been accounted for at this time.
After:
There's
a
lot
to
accomplish
and
we
can't
wait
to
get
started.
Since
many
of
the
goals
have
yet
to
be
defined,
we
suggest
spending
the
next
three
months
focused
on
figuring
out
how
your
brand
looks,
feels
and
acts.
This
is
going
to
give
us
a
strong
foundation
that
will
support
-­‐ and
even
inform
-­‐ future
marketing
activities.
44
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

46. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to [CLIENT] and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
45
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

47. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to [CLIENT] and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
46
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Like
some
kind
of
superpower?

48. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to [CLIENT] and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
47
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
I
think I
know
what
you’re
trying
to
say,
but
it’s
awkward.

49. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to [CLIENT] and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
48
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Overly
complicated.

50. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to [CLIENT] and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
49
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
Show
me,
don’t
tell
me.

51. Putting
all
this
into
practice
www.thesuttercompany.com
Before:
Focusing on the power of social media, we were able to
combine local targeting and campaign optimization to close
the loop between brand likeability and sales. The different
market insights in terms of sentiment proved to be
invaluable to CLIENT and are now being used in product
development and future worldwide marketing efforts.
After:
We
combined
local
targeting,
campaign
optimization
and
the
power
of
social
media
to
close
the
loop
between
brand
affinity
and
sales.
Through
our
research,
we
identified
four
archetypal
customers
that
[CLIENT]
continues
to
use
in
its
product
development
and
worldwide
marketing
efforts.
50
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

52. Six
steps to
persuasive
writing
www.thesuttercompany.com 51
© 2015 The Sutter Company.
1
2
3
4
5
Pause.
What
do
you
want
to
say?
Who
are
you
saying
it
to?
Word
dump
Tell
a
story.
Use the
writer’s
checklist
to
break
bad
habits.
Edit
to
simplify
and
clarify
6 Proofread!!

53. 52
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

54. 1.Step
away
for
a
while
2.Look
for
something
different
every
time
3.Check
accuracy
of
names
4.Look
at
a
hard
copy
5.Read
the
text
out
loud
6.Use
spellcheck
(carefully!)
and
a
dictionary
7.Read
the
text
backwards
53
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

55. www.thesuttercompany.com
What
about
creativity?
54
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

56. 55
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

57. What
creativity
can’t
fix:
Typos
An
unanswered
brief
Dense
copy
that’s
impossible
to
read
Obsequious
use
of
the
client’s
brand
Formats
that
are
difficult
to
distribute,
read
and
store
www.thesuttercompany.com 56
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

58. Smart
ways
to
be
creative
Be
strategic,
not
gratuitous
Give
something
of
value
Formats
that
enhance
your
submission
Get
the
right
people
involved
www.thesuttercompany.com 57
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

59. www.thesuttercompany.com
Questions?
58
© 2015 The Sutter Company.

60. www.thesuttercompany.com
Want
a
consultation?
Contact:
jody@thesuttercompany.com
917-­‐312-­‐3016
59
© 2015 The Sutter Company.