Clever Copy for Happy Users @ #psuweb
The wrong word or misplaced phrase can send users in the wrong direction (or away from your brand). From government agencies, to university departments, to national franchises, Lauren helps clients clear user experience roadblocks by being proactive with clever copy. Learn how to measure success, find meaning behind missteps, and maintain the standards your audience needs. Be clever--measured, intentional, and consistent--to build a community of happy users.
1. Clever Copy for Happy Users
Lauren T. G. Colton
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015
2. Let’s Talk
Key Points
1. Words shape the user experience.
2. Keep testing, keep improving.
3. Our messages are a starting point.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
3. Let’s Talk
Our Glossary:
Clever: being skillful enough to impact others.
Happy: going beyond “satisfactory” experiences.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
4. Let’s Talk
When do words matter?
Project Management
Search Engine Optimization
Information Architecture
Content Strategy
Accessibility
Usability
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
5. Intentional Measured Consistent
Know your intent,
your target users,
and clearly
address the
distance between
you.
Balance quantitative
and qualitative
usability testing with
both art and science.
Govern standards
and responsibility
across a project,
and get ready to
change.
6. “The web does not just connect
machines, it connects people.”
Tim Berners-Lee
7. Intentional Aware
Who are you?
Where do you come from?
…geographic, social?
Where do you want to go next?
…large user base, localization?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
8. Intentional Aware
Who are you?
Students who wanted to leave the
community after graduation were less
likely to present the regional dialect.
Ito & Preston, 1998
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
9. Intentional Aware
Who are you?
Brand Biography
• Expert but not bossy (MailChimp)
• Unconventional (Mozilla)
• Tenacious (msu.edu)
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
10. Intentional Aware
Who are target users?
Where do they come from?
…linguistic, socioeconomic?
Where do they want to go next?
…ambitions, affiliations?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
11. Intentional Aware
Who are target users?
The same users were likely to have
individualistic tendencies on Facebook,
and collectivistic tendencies on Renren.
Qiu, 2014
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12. Intentional Aware
Who are target users?
Who is P1?
Title: Returning users, experienced
Rank: 2
Description: 25-40 years old, with high level of
technical literacy. Completing work-related tasks.
Goal: Open personalized dashboard.
Message: Your day is about to get easier.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
13. Intentional Aware
Who are target users?
Limerence
The ego projecting Self onto Other, or seeing beauty in
what is familiar.
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14. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
“…the structural integrity of meaning
across contexts.”
Jorge Arango
Contextual
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15. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
Cognitive Load
The mental effort to comprehend and use a tool or
information, whatever the task complexity or structure.
Contextual
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16. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
Cognitive Load
Balancing emotional, visceral information with linguistic
information.
Contextual
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17. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
Cognitive Load
Rely on user intuition more than working memory:
• Use expected vocabulary and structure.
• Offer scannable, categorized copy.
• Make available actions apparent.
Contextual
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18. Intentional Contextual
Bridging the gaps
Who speaks, about what topic, and in
what style?
Language determines the boundaries of inclusion
and exclusion.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
19. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
Are you willing to bridge that gap?
Strategy: is this a conversation you want to have?
Style Guide: is this a conversation you can have?
Contextual
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20. Intentional
Bridging the gaps
See https://www.crystalknows.com/
Contextual
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22. Intentional Straightforward
Avoid jargon
Are these your words, or the words of your
audience?
• Unnecessarily-technical terms
• Legalese
• Marketing copy fads
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24. Intentional Straightforward
Give common words common meaning
Use the words of your audience if you can,
and define industry terms when you can’t.
• Check out your competition.
• Search Google Trends.
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27. Intentional Straightforward
Give common words common meaning
Use the words of your audience if you can,
and define industry terms when you can’t.
• Check out your competition.
• Search Google Trends.
• Maintain a project style guide.
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28. Intentional Straightforward
Be precise
Remove unnecessary words for more-
direct copy.
Show just enough:
• Can this be hidden until expanded?
• Can this be accessed by a search or filter?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
29. Intentional Straightforward
Be precise
Most important message at the top.
Short sentences: try for less than 15 words.
Short paragraphs: try for less than 5 sentences.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
30. Intentional Straightforward
Promote descriptions, demote exceptions
Put the main idea first.
1. Verb
2. Descriptor
3. Noun
4. Exception
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31. Intentional Straightforward
Don’t hide the verbs
Stop hiding your intended meaning behind
passive copy.
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32. Intentional Straightforward
Be actionable
Lead with a familiar verb, and be specific.
• After selection, where will users land?
• What benefit do they get out of this action?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
33. Intentional Straightforward
Be actionable
What is the primary call to action?
Web: within 400px of top.
Mobile: on screen without scroll.
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34. Intentional Straightforward
Use visual aides
Text does not live in a vacuum.
The format shapes user perception.
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35. Intentional Straightforward
Use visual aides
The most-important information should
draw the most attention.
Larger text
Intense color
Increased contrast
Bullets and arrows
Proximity
Density
Normal sentence case Headings
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36. Intentional Straightforward
Know which grammar rules matter
Grammar is for the sake of clarity; words
should flow as naturally as spoken language.
• You can start sentences with “but” as well as end on
prepositions.
• You can be right, and still be wrong.
• Sometimes an oxford comma changes everything.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
38. Intentional Straightforward
Remember:
Be aware of your goals and your users.
Work with the contextual gaps.
Use straightforward communication.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
39. “If you torture the data long enough,
it will confess.”
Ronald Coase
40. Ask both “how?” and “why?”
Measured Balanced
Quantitative: data on “how” users to
build inferences.
Qualitative: understand “why” with
valuable observations.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
41. Ask both “what?” and “why?”
Measured Balanced
Art: Adapting heuristics to goals and
context in fresh ways.
Science: Testing and iterating with defined
questions and processes.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
42. Ask both internally and externally
Measured Balanced
Thought experiments: question yourself
and your internal team.
Scientific experiments: test and measure
the target users.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
43. Measured Experimental
Parking Lot Test
Would a target user stand in a parking lot,
delaying their commute home to hear this
message?
Qualitative | Internal | Interesting
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44. Measured Experimental
1. Image 3 users, not 100.
2. Is this message informational,
actionable, or entertaining?
3. Do they care?
Parking Lot Test
Qualitative | Internal | Interesting
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
45. Measured Experimental
Do you want to hear how to spend three
less minutes a year on car insurance?
Parking Lot Test
Qualitative | Internal | Interesting
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
46. Measured Experimental
The Mom Test
If your mother heard you say this, would
she call shenanigans?
Qualitative | Internal | Genuine
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
47. Measured Experimental
1. Pick someone who knows you as a
person, and is honest with you.
2. Add “Dear [Mom]” to the beginning.
3. Would they laugh in your face?
The Mom Test
Qualitative | Internal | Genuine
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48. Measured Experimental
This innovative app will disrupt the dog-
owning community by leveraging a
streamlined, scalable platform.
The Mom Test
Qualitative | Internal | Genuine
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49. Measured Experimental
Flesch Reading Ease
How much education and concentration
does a user need to understand and act
on this text?
Quantitative | Internal | Understandability
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50. Measured Experimental
Flesch Reading Ease
Quantitative | Internal | Understandability
Score Easily understood by the average
90.0–100.0 11 year old (very easy)
60.0–70.0 High school student (standard)
30.0–50.0 College graduate (difficult)
0.0–29.9 Advanced degree graduate (very confusing)
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51. Measured Experimental
Flesch Reading Ease
Quantitative | Internal | Understandability
“Jump high and hard with intention and heart…take
what you have and stack it up like a tower of teetering
blocks. Build your dream around that.”
Cheryl Strayed, Tiny Beautiful Things
Score: 94.3
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52. Measured Experimental
Pair Storytelling
Can the target user easily and accurately
summarize this passage?
Qualitative | External | Clear
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53. Measured Experimental
1. Ask users to read at least one paragraph
of copy out loud.
2. Note where they stumble.
3. Ask them to summarize with a single
sentence.
Pair Storytelling
Qualitative | External | Clear
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54. Measured Experimental
Pair Storytelling
Qualitative | External | Clear
DESDEMONA
Be thou assured, good Cassio, I will do
All my abilities in thy behalf.
DESDEMONA
I’ll try my best, Cassio.
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55. Measured Experimental
Cloze Deletion Test
When shown an incomplete message, do
users fill the blanks with the same terms?
Quantitative | External | Vocabulary
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56. Measured Experimental
1. For 125–300 words of text, replace
every fifth word with a blank space.
2. Ask users to fill in the blanks.
3. Divide matches by number of blanks,
and look for a score of more than 60%.
Cloze Deletion Test
Quantitative | External | Vocabulary
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57. Measured Experimental
Want _____ experts on your bookshelf?
_____ Works is sharing our _____ app tips
and tricks _____ the book, Professional
_____ Application Development. We deliver
_____, personalized, powerful mobile _____
for our clients, and we’re _____ our secrets.
Cloze Deletion Test
Quantitative | External | Vocabulary
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58. Measured Experimental
Reverse Card Sorting
Without page content or interface, can
users anticipate which page in a menu
helps them complete a task?
Quantitative | External | Categorization
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59. Measured Experimental
1. Present a menu structure and task.
2. Track selection, and backtracking.
3. Did groupings and naming conventions
confuse people?
Reverse Card Sorting
Quantitative | External | Categorization
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62. Measured Experimental
Heatmapping
Do user expectations and anticipated
conventions match the expectations and
conventions of your team?
Quantitative | External | Expectations
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63. Measured Experimental
1. Present copy within a wireframe,
mockup, or screenshot; give a task.
2. Ask users where they would click next.
3. Did user expectations match yours?
Heatmapping
Quantitative | External | Expectations
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66. Measured Experimental
Five-Second Test
What do users recall drawing their eye?
Is it the action you want them to take?
Quantitative | External | Actionable
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67. Measured Experimental
1. Show the interface with your copy for
five seconds.
2. Ask what made an impression:
What does this page do?
Can you buy apples on this page?
What do you remember?
Five-Second Test
Quantitative | External | Actionable
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70. Measured Experimental
Day-After Recall
After reading a passage, was it “sticky”
enough for users to remember the
primary call to action?
Qualitative | External | Memorable
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71. Measured Experimental
1. Show a passage of text.
2. Wait a day.
3. Ask them to summarize the point.
Day-After Recall
Qualitative | External | Memorable
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72. Measured Experimental
Send a “can you read this” email, then
drop by to ask about it the next day.
Day-After Recall
Qualitative | External | Memorable
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73. Measured Experimental
A/B Testing
When similar groups are presented
alternate solutions, which guides them to
meet your goals?
Quantitative | External | Performance
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74. Measured Experimental
1. Divide testers into demographically-
equivalent groups.
2. Show each group a different variation.
3. Do a task analysis.
A/B Testing
Quantitative | External | Performance
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75. Measured Experimental
A/B Testing
Quantitative | External | Performance
Task A B
Are you registered
to vote?
Speed: 10 sec.
Accuracy: 78%
Speed: 15 sec.
Accuracy: 92%
Where is your polling
location?
Speed: 12 sec.
Accuracy: 85%
Speed: 13 sec.
Accuracy: 89%
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76. Measured Experimental
Usability Magnitude Estimation
How difficult do users expect a task to be;
what is the difference between their pre-
and post-task assessment?
Qualitative | External | Functional
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77. Measured Experimental
1. Provide a task, ask how difficult they
expect it to be.
2. Provide copy in interface; users talk
through task completion.
3. Ask how difficult it was.
Usability Magnitude Estimation
Qualitative | External | Functional
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78. Measured Experimental
Usability Magnitude Estimation
Qualitative | External | Functional
Task Pre Post Delta
Log into customer portal. 1 2 +1
Pay water bill. 3 3 0
Update payment information. 4 3 -1
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
79. Measured Experimental
Remember:
Ask both “how” and “why” users act.
Question internally and externally.
Balance science and art.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
81. Consistent Assigned
Digital Governance
Strategy: principals and performance objectives to
pick a direction that leverages the market.
Policy: guidance to manage organizational risk with
what to do, and what not to do.
Standards: the nature of all project aspects, such as
editorial, production, and design.
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82. Consistent Assigned
Digital Governance
What is in your digital inventory?
Who touches each piece?
…do things with purpose.
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83. Consistent Adaptive
Focus on Dialogue
You do not have the last word. The
message is a starting point.
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84. Consistent Adaptive
Get Ready for Change
No one is sure where the market, or
technology, will go next.
Are people, informed, able to act, and entertained?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
85. Consistent Adaptive
Get Ready for Change
Use your insights to turn strategy and
observations into next steps with a culture
of adaptation.
• Ask people what they think, and help them speak.
• Thank people, and give recognition for input.
• Don’t punish failure that helps us learn.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
86. Consistent Adaptive
Standardize Reevaluation
If it’s not in the process, it won’t happen.
• Who is accountable?
• What is “success”?
• Which users are top priority?
• When should we ask again?
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
87. Consistent Adaptive
Remember:
Assign who is responsible, and for what.
Work for dialogue.
Make change part of the process.
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88. References & Further Reading
Brooks, David. The Social Animal: The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement (New York, NY:
Random House), 2011.
Colton, Lauren. “Mobile User Interface Design” in Professional Mobile Application Development (Indianapolis,
IN: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2012), 89–115.
Crystal, https://www.crystalknows.com/.
Deutscher, Guy. Through the Language Glass: Why the World Looks Different in Other Languages (New York,
NY: Metropolitan Books), 2010.
“Federal Plain Language Guidelines.” plainlanguage.gov (1 March 2011).
www.plainlanguage.gov/howto/guidelines/FederalPLGuidelines/FederalPLGuidelines.pdf.
Garner, Bryan. HBR Guide to Better Business Writing (Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Publishing), 2012.
Haverty, Marsha. "What We Mean by Meaning: New Structural Properties of IA.” Presentation at the Information
Architecture Summit, Minneapolis, MN, April 22–26, 2015.
Hay, Steph. “Being Real Builds Trust.” A List Apart (28 August 2012). http://alistapart.com/article/being-real-
builds-trust.
Heath, Chip. Made to Stick: Why Some Ideas Survive and Others Die (New York, NY: Random House), 2007.
Hinton, Andrew. Understanding Context (Sebastopol, CA: O’Reilly Media, Inc.), 2015.
Ito, Rika & Dennis R. Preston. 1998. Identity, discourse, & language variation. Journal of Language & Social
Psychology 17, 4:465–83.
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
89. Optimal Workshop, https://www.optimalworkshop.com/.
Qiu, Lin, Han Lin, & Angela K.-y. Leung. 2014. Cultural Differences and Switching of In-Group Sharing Behavior
Between an American (Facebook) and a Chinese (Renren) Social Networking Site. Journal of Cross-Cultural
Psychology 44, 1: 106–121.
Spool, Jared. "Is Design Metrically Opposed?" Presentation at the Information Architecture Summit,
Minneapolis, MN, April 22–26, 2015.
UsabilityHub, https://usabilityhub.com/.
Wachter-Boettcher, Sarah. Content Everywhere: Strategy and Structure for Future-Ready Content (New York,
NY: Rosenfeld Media), 2012.
Welchman, Lisa. Managing Chaos: Digital Governance by Design (New York, NY: Rosenfeld Media), 2015.
Whitenton, Kathryn. “Minimize Cognitive Load to Maximize Usability.” Nielsen Norman Group (22 December
2013). http://www.nngroup.com/articles/minimize-cognitive-load/.
Wiebe, Joanna. CopyHackers Book 2: Formatting & the Essentials of Web Writing (Victoria, BC: Copyhackers),
2011.
Wiebe, Joanna. CopyHackers Book 4: Buttons & Click-Worthy Calls to Action (Victoria, BC: Copyhackers), 2011.
Zeratsky, John. “5 principles for great interface copywriting.” Google Ventures (18 February 2014).
https://www.gv.com/lib/5-principles-for-great-interface-copywriting.
References & Further Reading
Web Conference at Penn State | 6.22.2015 @LaurenTGC #psuweb #CleverCopyUX
Thank you to organizers. Help even more brilliant, curious people connect with the conference with #psuweb
I’m from Gravity Works in Michigan, and we make sweet websites, mobile apps, and print design. As a member of the operations team, I’m working on sales, project management, content, and usability: People and Language.
Feel free to ask questions. I can speak about clients and end users, being a vendor and being in house
What do you want to get out of this?
Clever is not about being in love with your words, but connecting people with meaning. Happy can mean calming people down when you’re telling them about terminal illnesses…giving them what they need to the point of a positive emotional experience
PM: rules & constraints? SEO: find you? IA: find what need? CS: what conversation? A11Y: how wide is your audience? USAB: meeting goals efficiently, effectively, and with satisfaction.
Language is a human experience, actually happening. Digital spaces helps words move farther, more quickly, to more people.
Your ambitions matter. Large user base means you might be at risk for diluting your message
Breakfast Club: Allison is an outsider who will have fewer regional markers, Claire is popular and likely to have regional markers (as well as other high-status, in-group linguistic attributes)
Defining tone within a project requires you to know your biography.
MC: technical product to general public, MZ: technical product with industry-pushing technology, MSU: land grant uni in land known for +ft snowfalls.
Many groups, multiple groups per person, and many overlaps
A bilingual user may have the same connections on two social networks, but moving between platform and language changes the conversation.
There can only be one. Can give them notecards and slots on a poster to make this clear.
Philosophical concept that David Brooks took further. If a thing is different from what users find familiar, or related to how they define themselves, they’re hearing how you’re an outsider instead of listening to your message.
Powerful, “sticky” messages are understood across contexts.
Cognitive psychology says some ideas are more difficult to process than others. Cognitive load says this message, within this context, may take more or less effort.
You might be increasing the load with unfamiliar messaging, or a message that seems familiar but is not (29.99)
Photos have a lower cognitive load, text carries more meaning…ease of use versus meeting your objectives. (Awareness, not avoidance.)
Use words that users don’t have to stop and think about. Blouses and trousers, or shirts pants. Shouldn’t need flashcards to use your website.
Demographics and contextual circumstances change vocabulary and structure: millennial “because”…smartphone error allowances
You don’t have to bridge a gap. If everyone on the team is over 50, living in West Virginia, you don’t have to target 18-25 in California.
You don’t have to. Tools like Crystal make some people feel icky. Publicly-available info used to build personality profile, used to give communication tips.
Ran on self because felt icky to share anything else. “use emotionally-expressive language” and “surprise them to get their attention”
Whoever you’re talking to will benefit from plain language.
Plain to one set of users is not necessarily plain to another set.
Milk, dairy, lactose.
Affordance by including alt term in scannable area
Glossary:
Glossary:
Glossary:
Dealing with subject matter experts, have them complete the story for you. Start with general language “I was filing taxes for my client, and I…” then listen to how they complete these stories.
They might not know what a lightbox or a carousel are. If the project calls for them, you’ll be talking about them.
Embrace minimalism…too many options make decisions more difficult
Don’t turn verbs into nouns (I was wanting), or be passive (the app was downloaded [by zombies]). The Passive Zombie Test: can you add “by zombies” to the end?
Users will browse and scroll. Primary: button, secondary: can be a link.
Simplify complex data by revealing structure, highlighting key facts, and comparing options
Clear information hierarchy
left aligned over justified, numerals, formatting (parentheses, em dashes, ellipses), lists have -5, parallel items, first is most important
Playing pong.
QUANT currently act with the existing interface.
QUAL observations with enough value to know why…hitting the back button, missing the primary call to action…
Take chances, consider new ways to provide solutions.
Study specific questions with clearly-defined parameters. Either your questions or your assumptions are too big if you don’t know where to start, or if you can’t say more than it depends.
If you can’t articulate how this is distinct from similar projects, you’re not an artist. If you can’t look at a communication design decision and say “I did ___ because ___” you’re not a scientist.
What does the person who helped make your monkey costume for the school play think about this?
Does not consider page organization, design elements, or localization.
Plenty of tools online, but use one consistently when comparing passages to account for minor differences
You can say big things with easily-read text.
Present them with the copy they’d see on the screen or in a print piece. Can be as simple as updating the call to actions
If you don’t include “the” or “and” in counting, be consistent across testing
How are categories grouped, and how labeled. Clearly, consistently show WHERE am I and WHERE can I go?
You want to transfer home phone and internet to your new address…
You want to transfer home phone and internet to your new address…
Would a monthly phone plan suit your needs better than “pay as you go”…
Would a monthly phone plan suit your needs better than “pay as you go”…
Can be informal, sending “can you read this” email, then dropping by to ask about it the next day.
General task analysis, but uncovers if it’s a usability or a marketing issue.
Is it a marketing issue or a usability issue?
maybe your organization was always messed up, didn’t have credible information, was wasteful and unable to collaborate. But it didn’t matter as long as your storefront to the world looked good. But now, you broadcast your company’s dysfunction to the whole wide world with the instant, digital, global communications channel that is the www.
A framework that gives you a space to collaborate. Who decides, and who maintains decisions?
UX is about wayfinding across silos to collaborate
You’re writing to fix an idea in place just long enough you can climb further. The message is just the first contact point of the rest of the experience. It’s your user’s story, so help them tell it.
No solution has a guaranteed market share in perpetuity. Future-capable systems are built around the people who need your information, use your tools, and are entertained by you. Next season’s fad doesn’t matter.
Milestone in your Gantt chart, calendar reminder to talk about the future, and retrospectives.