Here are great tips about how to write great college application essays, especially for California high school students.

1. Getting to Know You
Fall 2020
Tips for Writing Powerful College
Application Essays
Rebecca Joseph
getmetocollege@gmail.com
@getmetocollege

2. College Four By Four Plan
Four Cal States
No essays except for EOP and Honors
Colleges
Now $70 per campus
Four Privates
Common Application and
supplements
https://getmetocollege.org/what-
colleges-look-for/2019-fall-diversity-
visit-programs
https://www.collegegreenlight.com/
Four UCs
Four insight Questions
Additional Information and Questions
New Activity Format
Four Scholarships
https://roybal-
allard.house.gov/uploadedfiles/stude
nt_resource_guide_2018-2019.pdf
https://www.maldef.org/wp-
content/uploads/2018/11/2019-
2020_MALDEF_Scholarship_Resource

3. The Role of Essays
Getting to know you,
Getting to know all about you.

4. Essays Are One Piece of The
Applicant’s Quilt
Test
Scores
Grades
Rigor of
Coursework
ActivitiesRec Letters
Unique
passions
and
potential
Demonstrated
Interest

5. Colleges Are Not Looking For…

6. University of California

7. Activities—500 character
responses
• Award or honor: We want to know about the awards and honors
you've received that mean the most to you.
• Educational preparation programs: Any programs or activities that
have enriched your academic experiences or helped you prepare for
college. ?
• Extracurricular activity: These could include hobbies, clubs, sports
or anything else you haven't had the chance to tell us about.
• Other coursework: These are courses other than those required for
UC admission (courses that do not fit in UC’s "a-g" subject areas). ?
• Volunteering / Community service: These are activities you've
donated time and effort to without getting paid.
• Work experience: This is for telling us about any paid jobs or paid
internships you've had. ?

8. One application
• What do you want UC to know about you?
Here’s your chance to tell us in your own
words.
• Directions
• You will have 8 questions to choose from. You
must respond to only 4 of the 8 questions.
• Each response is limited to a maximum of 350
words.
• Which questions you choose to answer is
entirely up to you: But you should select
questions that are most relevant to your
experience and that best reflect your
individual circumstances.
• Keep in mind
• All questions are equal: All are given equal
consideration in the application review
process, which means there is no advantage
or disadvantage to choosing certain questions
over others.
• There is no right or wrong way to answer
these questions: It’s about getting to know
your personality, background, interests and
achievements in your own unique voice.

9. Fall 2020 Prompts
1. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced
others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.
2. Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original
and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
3. What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated
that talent over time?
4. Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to
overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
5. Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to
overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
6. Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest
inside and/or outside of the classroom.
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
8. What is the one thing that you think sets you apart from other candidates applying to the
University of California?

10. •“Think of it as
your interview
with the
admissions
office. Be open.
Be reflective.
Find your
individual voice
and express it.”

11. Sample Responses
3. What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over
time?
I joined Pali’s Moot Court program last year as the only new member among a group of seasoned participants fearing
that I would not compare. Of course I overlooked how I had been developing my argumentation skills since I was
blessed with a younger sister and had debated proposals in Youth and Government since ninth grade.
In preparation for my first Moot Court competition, I devoted countless hours to studying case law and writing my
speech. In the months before the statewide competition, I practiced my speech dozens of times before a fake justice
panel. In Moot Court participants compete as a Petitioner, Respondent, and Justice, meaning simply that everyone
argues both sides of a case and then presides over the debaters. To excel, I have to know the case law like the palm of
my hand, create completely original arguments, and respond very quickly to questions.
During this first statewide competition, I was arguing issue 1 and 2 while my partner was supposed to argue issue 3,
but my skills were put to the test when my partner failed to show up. An hour before giving my speech, I was forced to
learn the entirety of issue 3 and create unique arguments for it.
Having to work within such a demanding time limit and then present before a panel of six scrupulous justices, I
learned that my eloquence and demeanor held up under pressure. Even without my partner, I won 1st place Petitioner
and 1st place justice in California.
Even since then, I’ve continued working to better myself, and six months later my new 2-person team competed in the
national Moot Court competition at Princeton. Despite the sweltering heat, we kept our composure round after round
and won third out of 500 teams across the nation.
By participating in Moot Court, I have advanced my greatest talent: debating, which harnesses my strengths in public
speaking, spontaneity, and innovative idea development.

12. Sample Responses
2. Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and
artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
I have always loved singing and problem solving. Everyone always says that singing is an art and that problem solving is a science, but after I
joined Acapali, Pali’s a cappella group, I finally found a perfect forum to explore both disciplines together.
It is actually quite interesting how such an artistic process takes the form of an experiment. To arrange a song we listen to the material and
experiment with hypothetical sounds. Once we go through a trial and error process of choosing syllables and vowels to replace instruments
we all gather around a big whiteboard and draw various charts to create the perfect song sequence. Often times we undergo the strenuous
collaborative process of taking two completely different songs and mashing them together.
Within the group, everyone has an equal chance to pitch ideas and direct the group towards their vision. We frequently marvel at the fact
that we work without a leader yet efficiently and productively. The idea of equal collaboration has become a shocking concept due to the
working models we see in the world today. Without one reigning force, I have learned that we still have the capacity to work collectively if
everyone utilizes the tool of listening.
In fact, listening has become the most important aspect of a group like Acapali. We all listen to each other's voices for ideas and for blend
when we actually sing. I didn’t have the ability to harmonize before I joined the group. Solely from the creative process of constructing multi-
level musical arrangements, I have expanded my repertoire to include upper and lower harmonies, musical transposition, and instrumental
vocal simulation.
The best thing about this art is that I get to share it with people. After we develop the perfect piece over a lot of heated discussion and
collaboration, we continue the work on a stage in front of people who appreciate what we have created. The stimulation never stops even
when everything is perfect because on stage we are completely focused on the group and keeping tempo, pitch, and blend.
Who says an art cannot be science?

13. Sample Responses
5. Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge.
How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
When I was 14-years-old, my dad was diagnosed with severe depression and became suicidal. Within
the space of two months, my entire life changed. Soon after the diagnosis while my father was in and
out of programs, our family had to move out of our house, and my parents separated. During this
time, all I could think about was the memories I had with my dad like the Dodger games he used to
take me to and his unique laugh when I would tell him a joke. It shocked me to think that my then
five-year-old brother Joey would not have these same memories that I had. Rather than letting my
dad’s illness affect my aspirations in life, I believe that my dad’s illness allowed me to fully mature as
a person.
With my father no longer able to support the family, my mom began work, and I took on a bigger
responsibility as an older brother. For a while, I tried to replicate my dad’s persona to my brother so
he would get the same amazing experience that I had with my dad growing up. However, it was quite
difficult as Joey did not understand why his dad could not be with him anymore. My approach shifted
during the summer of 10th grade when I became a counselor at Camp Harmony, a non-profit that
sends underprivileged kids to camp. I realized that just as it was unsuccessful for me to act like a
father to Joey, the kids at camp did not want me to be a fatherly figure to them. However, they
needed a brother, and I knew I could be that.
After camp, I started to be a better role model to my brother which helped him understand our
situation much better. I have returned to Camp Harmony two more summers and serve on their teen
board. While I would do anything to have my dad back as he once was, I believe that in overcoming
his absence, I became a stronger person for my family and community.

14. Sample Responses
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
I have always appreciated my education and am exceptionally lucky to attend a diverse public school that values and
supplies great educational opportunities. However, until recently, I was ignorant about the limited educational
opportunities for kids that live only an hour away until I worked with the Wise Readers to Leaders Program this past
summer.
As a volunteer teaching assistant, or junior literacy leader, I worked with a sixth grade class of mostly Latino students. I
led guided reading and created lesson plans to enhance their understanding of literature and encouraged them to
enjoy learning. To accomplish our collective goal of stemming the “summer slide,” a regression in reading ability over a
summer of limited stimulus, I worked with the team to provide the children with books and teach them invigorating
lessons. I was shocked that these children who had so much drive were reading at a mere fourth grade level.
I instantly felt connected to these students because my grandmother was raised with limited educational
opportunities in Cuba and immigrated to this country speaking only Spanish. When one of my 13-year-old students
was having an especially hard time writing stories in English, it was my idea to catalyze the transition by having him
create his own comic book and combine his artistic gifts with the English language. As we worked together, I found
that the integration of art helped increase his reading levels.
Because many of these kids weren’t offered creative learning classes at school, I worked tirelessly to stimulate my
class’s creativity and to motivate them to engage in any activities they possibly could. I’ll never forget the radiant look
on my student Cindy’s face when she told me that after I motivated her to ask to join the academic decathlon team
the following year, she was accepted as a participant. Not only did I help my students, but they also helped me to feel
a greater sense of community and obligation.

15. Sample Responses
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
Most people ask me why I decided to work at The Yogurt Shoppe over Toppings, the only two successful and
delicious "ice cream" shops in the Pacific Palisades. Toppings is infamous at Pali High for hiring many junior and
senior students, so it might be odd that a student is hired at the only frozen yogurt stop in the area, that isn't
Toppings.
I don't mind the questions and curiosity. It reminds me why I truly enjoy working at The Yogurt Shoppe. While only
a few of us can call the Palisades home, there's a strong community bond that most share living here. Unlike
Toppings, we at the Yogurt Shoppe truly make an effort in connecting to the community around us through
outreach. Every day during "happy hour," we help local schools fundraise for various programs, as well as
fundraise for local and national charitable organizations. Additionally, we contribute to local venues and events, like
our cup decorating contest! So far, we have managed to donate almost $40,000 to the community. Not many
people have the opportunity to be a part of something so grand, while simply serving frozen yogurt to smiling
children.
After my first interview with the owner, I knew The Yogurt Shoppe was where I needed to work. He explained to me
his goals for The Yogurt Shoppe and what he aspires it to become, which all revolved around the community. "I
want The Yogurt Shoppe to be a place where families come to hang out and enjoy their afternoon in the Palisades
village, running into people they know and starting up conversation." I was hooked. Being a youth leader a few
blocks away, and growing up learning about the necessity to give back, I recognized what a perfect fit The Yogurt
Shoppe was for me.
They say when it comes to occupations, "Do what you love and love what you do" and while serving frozen yogurt
at a self-serve frozen yogurt joint is pretty specific, I can honestly claim that I am doing what I love: to serve others
and to give back.

16. Sample Responses
4. Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an
educational barrier you have faced.
Because of Pali Production, I have been exposed to actual live filming of shows, such as America's Home Funniest
Videos and Fuller House. I was able to talk to many people who aid in the production of these shows, including the
producer, the title I hold in the class. Further, I competed in a national convention in Atlanta, the Student Television
Network (STN), where I won an Honorable Mention Award for a commentary submission on Liberalism, a first
place award for the website structure I proposed and fundraised for, and ultimately, a first place award for
Broadcast Excellence. Now recognized as one of the best in the nation, we have received technological equipment
as prize awards.
We have accomplished so much while only being given a broom closet next to the men's restroom as a "studio" by
the school. As a part of the Public Relations department, I have contacted multiple local businesses to display
advertisements on the Pali Production website. Additionally, I am in charge of the entire high school's weekly
FaceBook posts along with the class's social media updates. As producer, I have created two shows, including a
comedy show that promotes the Pali Production name while involving the student body and the first-ever Pali High
Leadership Show that enables student government leadership to make weekly announcements through film media
replacing a disrupting loudspeaker.
Pali Productions has exposed me to the "real business world," allowing me to flourish and enhance skills like
communication, leadership, and teamwork. I now plan to embed this work into my college experience and
professional career.

17. Sample Responses
8. What is the one thing that you think sets you apart from other candidates applying to the University of California?
I believe I stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California because I am dedicated
simultaneously to improving the individual problems of teenagers and to creating multiple avenues for teenagers to
seek and receive support.
For the past three years, I have volunteered as a listener at Teen Line, a nationally recognized, confidential peer-to-
peer call in and email hotline. Time and time again, I connect with distressed teenagers, whether they have just fought
with a friend, suffer from bullying, or just feel blue. Serving as a safe haven hopefully helps the callers and has most
definitely changed my life. I am now a mental health advocate and activist because I value the power of empathetic
listening.
Last spring I was asked to mentor the incoming Teen Line training group. Not only did this experience connect me to
my passion for psychology and helping the community, but it also prompted me to bring peer mental health support
to my high school, because I have met many students in crisis in my community. Although I initially experienced
administrative opposition, when I demonstrated the power of Teen Line, I received approval. I created “NormanAid
Mail,” an email service that advises students in crisis and specifically refers them to school resources.
Realizing I wanted to reach additional struggling teens, I needed to become proactive. Therefore, I began the
“NormanAid Monthly Mental Health Series,” thematic activities for students, families, and teachers. In addition, I
overcame my fear of public speaking and began addressing groups of parents, therapists, and even Los Angeles Police
Department cadets. For each community, I tailor my message and observe how desperate they are for additional
powerful strategies to help the increasing number of emotionally distraught teens.
My work is never-ending. Currently, I am about to be featured in a national campaign--Different Is Beautiful-- to
highlight the power of celebrating our differences and erasing stereotypes for students in middle and high school. I
don’t envision my commitment to expanding and depending mental health support to adolescents to ever end.

18. Fall 2020 EOP Questions
Answers to the following questions will help us determine your motivation
and preparation to undertake college work. Please answer as precisely and
honestly as possible. Use complete sentences and avoid responses such as
“yes” or “no.”
• List any volunteer, extracurricular activities, or work experience in which
you are or have been involved in the past two years.
• Why would you like to attend college? Discuss your career and personal
goals. Are there any particular circumstances, school experiences, or
persons that influenced your preparation or motivation to attend
college (e.g., cultural/financial background, family, teachers, schools you
attended)? Please explain.
• Briefly discuss your academic background. Did you utilize any additional
support at your high school, such as tutoring? Do your grades in high
school and/or college reflect your academic ability or potential? 4
• Briefly describe your family’s economic background. Include information
about your financial challenges.
• Please tell us more about yourself. Is there any additional information
you would like EOP to consider in determining your admission to the
program?

19. The Common Application

20. Fall 2020 Common Application Prompts
• 1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so
meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this
sounds like you, then please share your story.
• 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later
success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did
it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
• 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What
prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?
• 4. Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an
intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma – anything that is of
personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its significance to you and
what steps you took or could be taken to identify a solution.
• 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of
personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.
• 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose
all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when
you want to learn more?
• 7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you’ve already
written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

21. Sample Essay
A fifteen-year-old boy cried on the other end of the line. While it was painful to hear him in such a
depressed state, I knew all I had the power to do was listen to him and his feelings. Knowing that
depression does not disappear over night, I began to explore his interests and discovered something
that could temporarily relieve his pain. We decided that playing with his dogs would comfort him the
most until he found a good therapist. After talking to him for two hours, I sensed that his melancholic
tone was now optimistic. Before hanging up, I also gave him a few hotlines and websites to contact. I
thanked him when he expressed his appreciation for my dedicating my time to talk to him. I wish I
could have done more, but I typically get only one chance to speak to any struggling teenager who
calls in.
For the past three years, I have volunteered as a listener at Teen Line, a nationally recognized,
confidential peer-to-peer call in and email hotline. Time and time again, I connect with distressed
teenagers, whether they have just fought with a friend, suffer from bullying, or just feel blue. Serving
as a safe haven hopefully helps the callers and has most definitely changed my life. I am now a
mental health advocate and activist because I value the power of empathetic listening. I am
dedicated to not only improving the individual problems of teenagers, but to also creating multiple
avenues for teenagers to seek and receive support.
Last spring I was asked to mentor the incoming Teen Line training group. Over several trainings, I
guided 20 teens through the process of becoming effective listeners and even helped them overcome
some of their own hardships. Not only did this experience connect me to my passion for psychology
and helping the community, but it also prompted me to bring peer mental health support to my high
school, because I have met many students in crisis in my community. Although I initially experienced
administrative opposition, when I demonstrated the power of Teen Line, I received approval. I
created “NormanAid Mail,” an email service that advises students in crisis and specifically refers
them to school resources.

22. Throughout my initial efforts, I responded to individuals who sought help. Realizing I wanted to
reach additional struggling teens, I needed to become proactive as well. Therefore, I began the
“NormanAid Monthly Mental Health Series,” thematic activities for students, families, and
teachers. During the most memorable event, actors from my school reenacted different scenes
at a “reality party” to which the police, counselors, and I responded. In addition, I overcame
my fear of public speaking and began addressing groups of parents, therapists, and even Los
Angeles Police Department cadets. For each community, I tailor my message, and observe how
desperate they are for additional powerful strategies to help the increasing number of
emotionally distraught teens.
Over my high school education, I have received an indescribable sense of appreciation after
speaking to teens about their conflicts, addressing groups of parents about mental health, or
seeing high participation in the mental health aid events. These feelings constantly motivate
me to continue with my efforts to helping teenagers with their endeavors.
My work is never-ending, and now I am developing a mental health curriculum through the
peer mental health club I run at school. I plan on promoting the message that we must do
more to help teens in crisis as I reach adulthood. I don’t envision my commitment to
expanding and depending support to ever end. Perhaps training more peer counselors will
reduce the problem. Perhaps reading and responding to emails will save another life. Perhaps
all of my efforts to reduce teenage traumas will create larger care communities. My goal is to
turn these perhaps examples into expanded realities.

23. Each College’s Additional Essays Differ

24. USC

25. USC=CommonApp + 2AdditionalShortEssays
• 1. 250 word max. Pick one.
• USC believes that one learns best when interacting with people of
different backgrounds, experiences and perspectives. Tell us about a
time you were exposed to a new idea or when your beliefs were
challenged by another point of view.
• Describe something outside of your intended academic focus about
which you are interested in learning.
• What is something about yourself that is essential to understanding
you?

26. Short USC Sample
With my three years as a key member of Crossroads Community Service Leadership
Committee and my recent acceptance into the Community Service Honors Society, I want to
spread my love for service and leave a legacy in my Crossroads community around the love of
helping others.
I want to help all Crossroads students find community service passions. I designed a mentoring
program in which senior Honors Society members are paired with freshmen. Throughout their
first year in high school, the freshmen receive guidance on how to navigate their involvement
in service on the Crossroads campus. I understand how many freshmen do not know how to
get involved, and it can be intimidating to join a senior’s club or volunteer to organize a drive
with upperclassmen. By creating the mentoring program, I hope to eliminate that fear and
turn it into a motivating factor.
Wherever I go, I feel a strong connection to other people who love service, and I want to
create a similar bond throughout and beyond Crossroads. Friendship and mentorship are both
powerful bonds that can lead to amazing work and life-changing experiences. There is strength
in numbers. One person can't help everyone, but a team can make a large impact.
At USC, I would join current service clubs and organizations. I would also act as a conduit
between service groups and potentially interested students to build a stronger community of
hardworking young adults who together will change the world.

27. Sample
When asked constantly why I do so much civic leadership at Brentwood, I always answer
because I want to give back to the community that has done so much for me. I feel a huge
sense of debt to my school, which when my financial situation changed in 9th grade, funded
my education for the past three years. As a leader, I believe in giving back to the community
for which I have the utmost appreciation and respect.
As head-prefect, I am focusing on building up unity within the high school. To improve school
spirit, I brought the House Cup back to the high school . This is a competition between grades
where students earn points for their perspective grades by attending different school events.
The winning grade each month celebrates with the House Cup trophy in their possession while
also receiving different prizes throughout the year. So far, the House Cup has not only
increased attendance at sports and art events but has also been very successful in increasing
school spirit and enhancing unity.
As head-prefect, I have also represented my school in the community. I was recently asked by
the head of school to represent the student body during a public hearing regarding
Brentwood’s construction plans. In front of an audience of a few hundred people, I defended
Brentwood in front of two public officials. I am thoroughly excited to continue to lead my
school the rest of senior year.

28. USC 2nd Supplement
2. Describe how you plan to pursue your academic interests at
USC. Please feel free to address your first- and second-choice
major selections. (250 word limit) (Required. 250 word max,
Paste in)

29. Sample
After extensive research and conversations with former alumni, I know firsthand how the
University of Southern California will sate my academic and intellectual hunger. Economics and
Political Science are two areas that I desire to study in college, and USC offers a great
combination of these passions.
While taking AP Microeconomics and AP Macroeconomics junior year, I learned that thinking
about the economy allows one to understand politics even more. Knowing that Economics and
Politics are two studies so rich in connection to each other, I was excited to discover that USC’s
Political Economy program not only combines two of my current passions but also allows me
the opportunity to integrate ethics and logic.
Along with the standard economic and political science courses available, two Political
Economy courses really stand out. The Political Economy of Institutions class will combine my
two passions right away, as I have always been interested in the role the government plays in
the economy. Another course that grabs my attention is the Law, Politics, and Public Policy
class. As a civic leader, I want to better understand the process of decision-making in making
laws. This class would allow me to explore how laws are made by researching and analyzing
different moral theories. The Political Economy major at USC would allow me to explore the
intersections with the economy and political theory and thus I am honored to submit my
application.

30. Essays=Opportunity
•Share
•Reflect
•Stand Out

31. Before All Essays: Strategic Planning

32. Organization Matters

33. Before Common App Long Essay:
Brainstorming Strategies

34. Before School Specific Essays

35. Through: Guided Questions

36. Through: Revising and Revising

37. Beyond: Completing The Puzzle

38. College Four By Four Plan
Four Cal States
No essays except for EOP and Honors
Colleges
Four Privates
Common Application and
supplements
https://getmetocollege.org/what-
colleges-look-for/2019-fall-diversity-
visit-programs
https://www.collegegreenlight.com/
Four Ucs
Four insight Questions
Additional Information and Questions
Four Scholarships
https://roybal-
allard.house.gov/uploadedfiles/stude
nt_resource_guide_2018-2019.pdf
https://www.maldef.org/wp-
content/uploads/2018/11/2019-
2020_MALDEF_Scholarship_Resource

39. Contact Dr. Joseph
• @getmetocollege
• All College Application Essays
• www.allcollegeessays.org
• getmetocollege@gmail.com