How to Know If You're In Love or Lust (38

How To Know Your
“In-love” & Not
“In-lust”?

Alternative Natural Contraceptive Guide
only for the ladies & gentlemen who “finally”
decided to be chaste
by
Zara Jane Juan

Romantic Love
 What is it?
 How do you know your in-

love?

How to Know Your In-Love & Not 2
In-Lust? by Zara Jane Juan

they say….
 “He is constantly on your
thoughts and first on your
mind upon waking up and
last on your thoughts
before falling asleep”

they say….

“You can’t keep a silly
smile off your face
when thinking of that
person”

they say….

“You know you have to
make few adjustments
in your life just to
accommodate this
person”

they say….

“He/ She has
unlovable traits but
you love him/her
just the same”

they say….

“there has to be
a “kilig”
factor”

they say….

“Real love can be
proven by time”


they say….

“When putting the
best foot forward is
not anymore what
both of you do”

Most people find that the
cure for love sick is to
go…. let go…
let the feelings lead you
where you are going...
but this one is really
dangerous

The danger of


falling in love is to
give in totally to
passion dictated by
emotions

 Love ruled by passion is not
in-love….
 Being in-love is ruled not just

by passion but by principle…
 Principle is you know what

you want and what you
don’t want!

 If both of you are being
ruled only by passion
without principles….
You are not in-love…
You are Infatuated…
Infatuation fades

 So slow down… …
 Sexual Passion is moving

water in the stream…
 It doesn’t have a mind of

its own.
 Be careful!

 If infatuation fades and
babies were created or
worst sickness were left
then you will be pressured
by the dictate of the
society…stress develops
afterwards.

 To avoid the Penile-Vaginal
Insertion (PVI) give limits to
yourself and to your partner:
 Declare the levels of physical

intimacy up to first degree
only…
 Holding hands…

 Lip kissing & Hugging

How to keep yourself SAFE?
 Avoid being alone when you
are passionate with someone


Divert
SENSUALITY to
CREATIVITY

Use your sensual passion to produce art
Write a Book
Learn to Paint
Dance to Your Desire
Sing w/ all Your Might

Keep your mind occupied w/ pure
thoughts & your body
will respond to it accordingly.

 Talk it out…Lay all the facts, analyze,
itemize…
 Talk your way out….Tell how
passionate you are to this person as
often as you can to release your
overflowing passion within
 But Remember to tell it only to the one
you can trust… and who to trust?... No
one else but God.

 Tell it to God!
 Start the conversation with God
through prayers
 Ask for healing… Ask for
guidance… Remember that
infatuation is not true love…
only God knows how to heal
it… Stay connected. Pray
meditatively.

 ALWAYS CARRY A CROSS WITH
YOU IF YOU’RE A CATHOLIC…
 FOR OTHER RELIGIONS,
ALWAYS CARRY ONE ITEM
IDENTIFIABLE TO YOUR
RELIGION
 HOLD ON TO IT AND PRAY
HARD… WHENEVER YOUR
SEXUAL PASSION IS
OVERFLOWING

 Do not expect instant healing
at once; overflowing sensual
passion is fatal sickness if not
cured. Healing will take time.
The first thing to do is to
know that your sick with it.


 Ways to tamed down overflowing sensual
passion:
 Eat Papaya everyday
 Tire yourself...Walk! Go to the Gym!
Exercise!
 Avoid chili foods & spices
 Pray 18x a day or
 Fill your day with complete schedule of
work with only lunch break and dinner
break as your rest in between

 Maintain friendship to the
person whom you have an
infatuation
 Sincere but distant;

 Detached but concern;

 Aloof but approachable

How to be SAFE from the person
you have strong sexual
vulnerability?

 Maintain one meter apart by putting
things or “safe people” in between
 Converse only on the phone to
reconcile your principles


 If the person whom you have deep
infatuation is not concern with your
principles and doesn’t even care to respect
it…. But you still like the person just the
same…. Pray…


 Just pray…


 You will be guided… it is a big load of
problem that only God can solve… Don’t
trust yourself… leave it to God!

 Do not try to find the same
level of sensual infatuation to
other people that you meet…
 It is chemistry

 Body’s reaction will depend

on elements


 If you give in to sensual
passion once outside
marriage…. go and ask for
forgiveness to God.
 Go to your priest, confess
your sin and ask for absolution
 Wait and ask for God’s mercy


 Chastity requires
conviction… first and
foremost, you must
believe that being chaste
is equivalent to human
complete civilization

 Chastity defines our
higher state of mental,
emotional and
psychological difference
to our fellow co-creations


 Working for our being in
achieving its full potential
and perfection requires
discipline of thoughts,
body, actions, reactions,
etc

 Our body is sacred… if you’re a
believer it is God’s temple… so you
take care of your body
wholeheartedly in the same way
you take care of God…
 If you’re a non-believer, you may

take the idea that your body is
worth your respect


 Be Considerate. Take time to be sensitive to
the person’s needs. Sympathize, listen to the
needs without prejudice, empathize, feel the
needs but keep your virtues and find ways
how you can provide without sacrificing
and hurting your principles

 Maintain the platonic friendship. Guard its
purity. Do not exploit your respect to the
person and your respect to yourself.


Remember:
 There are no accidental meetings or
acquaintances.
 The person whom you have deep passion is
your sheep at a lost.
 Exhort.
 Be responsible.
 The person needs your help.
 Be the shepherd not the sheep. Lead.

 As a shepherd, be sensitive to
the needs of your sheep.
Search for wholesome events,
activities, meetings, people,
etc. for the person’s
fulfillment and social
development

 If the person became aloof or indifferent,
guard yourself not to be offended while you
are in the process of analyzing how you can
help this person without compromising
your virtues and principles. Take time to
secure their emotions for they are very
insecure. Being self-oriented, they are
afraid to get hurt after experiencing
traumatic pain. Patience my dear, patience


 Acknowledge the fact that you are
highly vulnerable and that you may fall
to someone. The problem is, if you are
not emotionally healed and matured
yet to handle the situation, the
experience will be traumatic. Be safe.
Wait. Pray for Discernment. If
doubtful, step back and take more time
to make everything absolute in your
heart and mind before you proceed.

Remember exposing ourselves to
individuals, groups of people,
activities, reading materials,
pictures, videos, etc that will lead
us to emotional vulnerability
….gives a warning signal to our
hypothalamus beforehand e.g we
feel uncomfortable…. If this
happens to you, get out right away!

 Say “I’m out of here!” or “I
can’t do it!” is ok to guard
yourself against the dangers of
emotional vulnerability


 Emotional vulnerability is like a
flue that will paralyze your whole
system for a while and will get
worst if not cured. Treatment is
relaxation away from the danger
zone. Calmness through deep
spiritual meditation and prayer. It
must be natural healing, wait for
the time

 Remember to stay away from
loud and obnoxious people
because they are harmful to the
spirits. Continue praying in
silence, do not worry, God will
guide you how to solve your
emotional vulnerability


 One cause of emotional vulnerability is
the weak family foundation during
your childhood. Do not compare your
emotional maturity to anybody because
each and every family is unique and
had undergone its own way of holding
the family’s foundation. Be intellectual,
analyze your childhood background to
understand why you are emotionally
vulnerable

 Take note that all effects
has its cause…
it’s scientific!
 Learn the law of nature

and deal with it
intellectually.

 If you extend more time to analyze and
practice intellectual exercises, you are
teaching yourself to discipline your
own emotional vulnerability. In due
time, you will know the answers to
your problems. So enjoy detailing
everything down the line. Allot a time
for yourself to do this intellectual
dialogue alone with God.


 Respect is the mediator between
two opposing sides that are
passionately connected.
 If you can’t get the respect,

release the person right away to
avoid getting hurt. You can love
the person unconditionally from
afar. How to Know Your In-Love & Not 46

 Remember: Consistency of your
actions will give you the respect
that you need. Be confident on the
virtues and principles that you
believe in. Do not adjust just to
please another fellow. Take care
of yourself. God loves you!


 Romantic love is to
 undergo the emotional, spiritual &

intellectual trainings day by
day…...
 You’re like a soldier about to face

conflicts and keep in mind that
whatever happens in the end…
ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND
WAR!

Think on the


brighter side….


 God had made two innocent people
in the most unexpected time to be
in-love and share their life together
no matter what the future holds, no
matter what the people say, no
matter what the dictate of society
states...People have the right to fall
in-love and every feeling of it is a
wonderful gift of Life. Amen.

How to Know If You're In Love or Lust (38

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